Ramblings, Writings, Thoughts, and More!

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Poetry Class Poem #1 - Crash

Metal meets metal.
A deafening roar.
Two bodies entwined together
in blood and in gore.


Sirens sound, detached noise,
Paramedics rushing to the floor
where two bodies twist together
not knowing what’s in store.


They should have listened,
too drunk to find the door.
Yet they insisted on driving,
And now their eyes see no more.


1 comment:

  1. I feel like you could play around with the shape of this poem and come up with some interesting things. For example, as I read it, I imagined the 4-line stanzas as rhyming couplets instead. However, after I tried it out, it didn't give your repetition of "Crash." much more oomph. That is my favorite part of this, by the way. It feels like I'm listening to you tell me what's happening/going to happen, while I'm watching them crash, crash, crash. Excellent technique.